Survivor

张三坚回来了 2022-04-25 08:56

Whenever disaster strikes, we always fervently pray for more survivors, hoping to minimize harm and provide people with hope.

During a conversation with a friend of mine, we touched the topic of “survivors.” As we spoke, it turned out that the sister talking to me was a survivor herself. With her consent, I will share her story. I asked her why she wanted to share such a private story with me, and she said, “Perhaps because you are also a survivor.”

Well, I am a lucky little guy blessed by fate.

This sister is a petite girl from Shanghai. Unexpectedly, despite her small stature, she has a big story. According to her recollection, when she was around ten years old, on a fine day, she was at home watching TV. Around ten o’clock, she went to the bathroom. Just as she opened the bathroom door, she found the front door got kicked open, and two men immediately busted in. They were surprised to see a child at home, probably having tried knocking on the door with no response. The sister was stunned because she hadn’t heard any knocking while in the bathroom. How did two men in blue uniforms suddenly break in?

Sister spoke first, “Who are you?” The two guys replied, “We are your dad’s colleagues.” Sister wondered how her dad could have colleagues like them. “My dad is not home, get out! Get out!” Upon hearing that there were no adults at home, they immediately grabbed her neck, lifted her, and forcefully pushed her into a small space in the bathroom. The taller one said, “No talking,” and then pulled out a knife approximately 40 centimeters long. Seeing this knife, sister thought it looked like a toy, and she wasn’t particularly afraid. Then the taller one said, “We are special agents, and now we are short of funds. You need to contribute.” The shorter one said to the taller one in Shanghainese, “Let her speak.” Back then, sister lived in Suzhou, and they assumed she couldn’t understand Shanghainese.

The taller one turned back and asked sister in Mandarin, “Where are the valuable things in your house?” Sister replied, “If there are any, they’re in that drawer.” They pried open the drawer and found exactly 300 yuan, which was a significant amount at that time. After robbing the money, the two criminals visibly improved their mood and ordered sister not to look at them and not to lift her head. They then used a white towel to gag her mouth, tied her hands and feet separately, and then reversed and bound her hands and feet together like a shrimp. After binding her, they threw her onto the bed, covered her with two blankets, and left. At that moment, she felt scared—why cover me with two blankets? Her mouth was gagged, making her unable to make any sound, and her hands and feet were tied up without any threat. Could it be that they were afraid of blood splattering on them when they killed me? Her mind was filled with fear.

Fortunately, the two criminals soon left her home. The entire robbery process took less than half an hour, probably because they were afraid that someone would return home. After they left, sister calmed down, managed to free herself, found her mother, and called the police. When the police arrived, they secured the scene, collected evidence, and conducted an investigation. The police asked sister about the appearance and accents of the two criminals. She described them as a tall one and a short one, speaking Shanghainese. The police immediately closed all highways to Shanghai based on this information, but they couldn’t catch the fugitives. Initially, the police thought it was a typical burglary, but thanks to the experienced sheriff, they quickly realized that the perpetrators were seasoned criminals, and the two robbers were very professional.

Sister was questioned at a neighbor’s house on the same day. She rested whenever she felt tired during the questioning, drank water, and continued answering questions. The police also praised her, saying things like “This child did well. Don’t resist. Very brave.” Gradually, sister calmed down and felt like everything had passed like the end of a movie.

However, a few days later, sister was taken to the police station for a statement. This time, it was not just her; a group of people surrounded her for questioning. It was then she knew there was a series of murders. They were the number one wanted criminals on the Interpol list and had committed multiple murders along their way. Sister is the only survivor.

Upon hearing this, I raised a question to sister because, in our impression, robbers like these usually cover their faces. So, why didn’t they wear masks? Sister’s response was twofold: firstly, they expected no one inside, and secondly, they killed anyone they encountered. The gang had shown no mercy to the elderly or children before. When the police questioned why they spared sister, they provided a simple explanation: they killed everyone else because they shouted and resisted loudly, fearing exposure. However, sister, being a child and not screaming uncontrollably, cooperated and even told them where the money was.

Three art teachers from different art institutes continually drew sketches of the murderers based on sister’s recollections. Since everyone who had seen these two criminals had died, sister, the only surviving witness to the true faces of the culprits, had to guide the artists until she confirmed their likeness. This prolonged and relentless process of questioning, fingerprinting, and redrawing deepened the fear in sister’s young heart. It turned out that the seemingly inconspicuous iron knife had been stained with the blood of more than ten people! Sister mentioned that when she closed her eyes, the image of that knife, which had nearly taken her life, haunted her.

A year later, these insane criminals were apprehended. They “coincidentally” targeted a police officer’s family. Following the same routine, “Is Mr. Wang home?” When the door opened, the family felt something was wrong. “Looking for Mr. Wang? Come with me,” and they were taken to the nearby police station. When they neared the station, the criminals tried to escape, but justice prevailed. Initially, the police thought it was just an ordinary theft, but an observant officer recognized one of them as the top wanted criminal from the sketches. Upon interrogation, it was revealed that these fugitives lived with the mindset of living each day as it comes. Why were they so ruthlessly evil? Initially, they only committed petty thieves but received severe sentences. They couldn’t find legitimate employment after release and thus returned to their criminal ways. Driven by a vengeful mentality against society, they committed a series of robberies. Just as the court was about to sentence them to death, sister, as a witness, had to place her fingerprints on the verdict.

Sister is a fortunate girl, someone who narrowly escaped the Grim Reaper’s scythe. However, she is not entirely lucky. In the process of repeatedly describing the criminals’ height, weight, and appearance, signing and pressing her fingerprint on the statement, over and over again, memories of the terrifying scene became increasingly ingrained. In the end, the fingerprint on the court’s document also left an indelible mark in her heart. Sometimes she even feels that she killed the three criminals because they were identified based on the sketches she provided, and it was her fingerprint that sealed their death sentence. The three criminals did not harm her, but they died because of her…

The experiences of her youth have left a lasting shadow on sister’s psyche. As she told the story, she couldn’t help but shed tears until the end. Even now, when she goes to bed alone, she must check every corner of the room, fearing that someone might be hiding there. Upon returning home, she always ensures to lock all the doors, and when she sleeps, she locks the bedroom door as well. Though she has grown stronger inwardly, she still cannot shake off these habits. It’s important to note that childhood psychological trauma is challenging to fully heal from. Fortunately, with the guidance and companionship of family, along with the maturation of her intellect and the development of her worldview and values, sister has gradually emerged from the shadows within.

She has come to understand that her actions saved more lives and prevented additional tragedies. If it weren’t for her courage in facing the criminals and her excellent memory, these felons might have continued to commit atrocities. Sister, in her kindness, aided others but inadvertently embedded a portion of the darkness within herself. Has the psychological trauma within her healed? I believe it has improved significantly, but it’s not entirely gone. She still feels reluctant to talk about this story and rejects the version of herself that pressed down that fingerprint.

I, too, have experienced psychological trauma and have been seeking healing. I believe that psychological wounds often stem from the hidden corners of our minds, from the challenging aspects of our past that are difficult to confront. My approach to self-healing is to openly reveal these scars to everyone. If there’s nothing to be ashamed of in my heart, why be afraid? Thus, through this article, I aim to help sister bravely face her past. To tell her that she did the right thing, that she is brave and kind. I also hope that those who read this article find the courage to face their inner selves and confront the ugliness present in the world.

This story also reminds me of an incident from my childhood. I was around ten years old, riding my bicycle home after evening self-study classes. Upon reaching home, I noticed the lights in the dining room were on, which seemed odd. Normally, at this time, no one should be home. Could it be that one of my parents had arrived early? Curious, I parked my bicycle in our basement and hurriedly climbed the three flights of stairs. (Our home, at that time, was a unit provided by my mother’s workplace, consisting of only six floors. I once asked my mom why it was only six floors, and she explained that beyond six or seven floors, an elevator would be required. I suppose my legs were well-exercised from cycling and climbing stairs repeatedly.)

Upon reaching the third floor, I paused; the door to our home was ajar, as if gently pushed closed. Thinking it might be that a family member forgot to latch the door securely, I casually pushed it open. As I entered, a sense of unease washed over me. Only the dining room light was on; the lights in the living room and bedroom were off. Hesitant, I moved forward, and fear had already taken hold of my heart. I dared only stand where there was light, attempting to peer into the darkness without venturing in. The scenes in the dark gradually became clearer, revealing that all the cabinets were wide open, clothes, papers, and miscellaneous items scattered everywhere. It suddenly dawned on me that our home had been burglarized. Valuables such as my mother’s wedding ring, my grandmother’s bracelet, and some money were gone. Reacting quickly, I rushed out and ran across the street to a telephone booth, calling my mom.

It was later revealed that our home had been robbed. For the next few months, I couldn’t bring myself to open the door alone or stay at home by myself. I even often urged my mom to move. Looking back, I consider myself fortunate that the thief had already left. Otherwise, I don’t know what the outcome might have been, and you might not be reading this article.

Through these stories of misfortune with a touch of luck in life, you can understand that, regardless of the situation, it depends on the kind of person you are and how you face the crises in life. Misfortune may be a blessing in disguise, and vice versa. The Chinese proverb “Misfortune may be an actual blessing, and blessings may turn into misfortune” is apt here. How can one appreciate the value of happiness without experiencing hardships? No matter what happens, as long as you have limbs, a reasonably functioning brain, and a kind heart, I believe you are fortunate.

You have to constantly remind yourself: you are a little lucky one in this world! I wish you increasing luck from now on!

Finally, I would like to conclude this article with a quote from the TV series “Heart Residence.” The difference between striving for a living and unscrupulous means lies in having a clear conscience. As long as you and I strive for a living with a clear conscience, luck will frequently accompany us.